Pine "de-coning"

[Rick Teinert]

We had a client recently request that we "de-cone" his large pine tree. This tree is not accessible with any lift of any type. I explained that I had never attempted this before, and that I wasn't sure how well it was going to work out. All of the cones are on the very ends of course. I was able to get a good amount of the cones but it's difficult to actually see them on the outer canopy. Two guys spent a whole day in the tree and still there's still a ton of cones remaining. Has anybody ever done this before? I've never heard of anybody wanting the cones off their pine tree.

 

[Kris Anderson]

Haha, I showed up to dead wood a spruce the other day and the client asked me if I could remove all the cones too.
She is putting in a hot tub under the spruce.
I told her how much more that would cost . We left the cones...

 

[Rick Teinert]

Haha that's why they want the cones off cause they fall in the hot tub.

 

[JeffGu]

Next, they'll want you to de-poop all of the birds that land in the pine tree.

 

[Nish]

While you're in the tree it only makes sense to pluck out all those aging needles. Sell him a monthly plan.

 

[Nish]

I see why you took the job. That's beautiful spot to spend the day in the tree. That water started calling to you around mid-day. By that hour you probably picked more pine cones than anyone who will ever read this thread, establishing yourself as a national expert on the craft.

 

[Brocky]

"Could you drain the sap out of it also?"

 

[evo]

Wow, this reminds me of a client that wanted me to install a fishnet to fold the limbs up seasonally. All so sap wouldn't drip from the cones to a deck

 

[Tom Dunlap]

The guy who taught me climbing would tell people:

I'll cut the legs off your dining room table if you pay me

 

[Nish]

Wow, this reminds me of a client that wanted me to install a fishnet to fold the limbs up seasonally. All so sap wouldn't drip from the cones to a deck

I love hearing of the ridiculous jobs clients have asked for. Is there already a thread on this somewhere?

 

[rico]

I actually spent a few months living in the brush in the Sierra's, collecting cones for the state of California (seed collecting project) a few years back. We would get food drops once a week, and they would pick up the cones we had collected. A ton of climbing, but a very cool experience! The stuff you guys are talking about is a bunch of insane, silly, rich, white folks trying to create their idea of controlled perfection. The modern world has lost it fucking mind!

 

[JD3000]

I love hearing of the ridiculous jobs have clients asked for. Is there already a thread on this somewhere?

Knew a lady that painted the bagworms on her spruces for Christmas. Thought they were just little cones.

"Ma'am I'm sorry to tell you this but..."

 

[JeffGu]

"Now, children... you be good, or Santa Worm will bag your ass up and hang you in the spruce tree!"

You've got to admit, it would be a clever Xmas decoration idea if it weren't for that whole worm thing.

 

[JD3000]

And the eats-the-whole-tree thing.

Nasty little buggers.

 

[cerviarborist]

I got curious about this thread and started surfing. Florel is apparently rated to reduce or eliminate fruiting in tree species including pines. I'd be curious to know whether anybody has successfully used it to keep pines from producing cones. I'm sure you'd have to hold a pesticide license that would allow you to spray trees, but if it works, it would be cool to just be able to spray the part of the tree over the hot tub, and deliver the desired results to your client.

 

[JD3000]

Used it on locusts. Timing is very important and results were kind of "meh"

 

[ATH]

Tried it on Crabapple. Yea..."meh" results. Will try again next year - determined client.

 

[rico]

So were gonna use some toxic poison because some yuppies don't want pine cones or crabapple in their hot-tub. Freakin' ridiculous!

 

[JeffGu]

How about this rare, novel idea.... "Why not build or buy a cover for the hottub, you lazy f*cks? Couple 10' sticks of PVC pipe... less than $20 of crap from Menards and some plastic dropcloths."

Oh, gee... I don't want spider turds dropping in my jar of peanut butter. Rather than have to take the lid on and off, I think I'll just tear the house down, instead.

I swear, there's an epidemic of stupid/lazy going around.

 

[JD3000]

So were gonna use some toxic poison because some yuppies don't want pine cones or crabapple in their hot-tub. Freakin' ridiculous!

Rich people keep me employed.