Tell me something stupid you did!

Threw the other end of my lanyard through a higher crotch to advance past it, got the snap stuck.. pulled hard on it with my face shield up and yanked the steel snap out straight into my grill. Split my brow wide open and bled all over the fucking place. This was also at the start of the day, it was -30 out and I had to carry on like a viking warrior with blood all over me for the rest of the removal.
 
So I started the day by pulling our brand new man lift, that I was supposed to be "testing", into a yard and quickly running out of fuel while at near full extension. (please note that I now know there are such features that make this a "not so big deal".) Strike 1. Then while backing our truck down his super steep, narrow, and winding driveway I blew a break line, which spewed fluid all over the place not to mention jack knife our truck and chipper.....luckily I threw the e-brake just before smashing the chipper. strike 2. So with my help running for gas, my boss on the way with another truck to help with the jack knife situation I decide to keep busy and drop a dead tree which was marked to come down. When the tree came over the top brushed an adjacent tree which I fully expected, but I didn't expect the adjacent tree to break a 30' section out of the one I was felling. The broken top came back towards me and smashed a wooden fence....a nice one at that. strike 3. Very humbling conversation followed with the homeowner, who btw I dout will ever call back......Def one of those days I should've went fishing or something.
 
Damn this is getting good!

Ok here are a few more.
I was out by myself thinning out a stand of douglas fir. These trees were planted about 10' apart, and there was about 50 of them. The specs were to chip the brush, drop a few logs, and to leave the bottom 20-25' standing as a snag. These trees were only about 40-50' tall. It was windy the whole time, all day I kept saying to my self "If this gets any worse I'm going to call it." It never did.
I got to the topping area, about 4-5" wood, and it was just a wall of green all around me swaying in the wind. I made my notch, and back cut aiming to glance a tree (to get the top to roll down). Just as it started to go over, the wind picked up, and the tree I was aiming for moved. I got it dead center, the hinge never broke, so this 20' top was about 20 degrees from horizontal hung up in the tree in front of me. I cut off every thing I could reach, and used every last bit I had to push, pull, wiggle this top to get it to go and nothing worked. My dumb ass decided to cut the hinge with my handsaw, and the but shot straight back in to my belly. It was directly on top of the spar, pushing me back into my laynard hard. I could breath but not very well, and already tired I couldn't get out of it. The only thing I could do is to reach as far as I could with my 200t and slice it to get it to go. I had a half moon bruise on my belly for about two weeks after that.



The next one was a hemlock full of dwarf mistletoe. I was just removing infected limbs, and had a high tie in. I keep the tail of my laynard knotted with a double overhand. After dicing these witches broom clumps up I would just bomb out the knuckle, which once on the ground were barely liftable. Tied in twice with a snug flipline I let one fly, it zipped down the tail of my flip, the tail did a full turn and hung up on the knot. Pinned so tight I couldn't release the carabiners, and couldn't pull up the tail I had to just cut my tail off with the saw.




In another doug fir, crown cleaning. I had the tip of a green twig go up my nose when turning my head. It was a hot day, and I was sweating all over and kept wiping my face with the backs of my arms.. Focusing on the road overhang I see a couple walking up with a stroller. I recognized them as some friends of my wife walking their son for his nap. I called out to them waving, not understanding the look of horror on their faces. It turned out the twig gave me a bloody nose, and I was bleeding all over my face wiping it up with my forearms...
 
monkeylove said:
I got my climbing saw so stuck one time I had to descend and get another saw. Ascend back up, tie off the first saw to the trunk behind the limb and then proceed to backcut the limb until both the branch dropeed and the saw swung free. That little mistake only cost me a new chain luckily.
Click to expand...


Ha...I did the same at the end of a blistering summer day but got my only other saw stuck as well. I had to spend way to much energy to use a hand saw, pole pruner, and ground guy with a rope to free it. Wish I'd known about MA.

I've also descended, forgetting I had my boot in a sling for footing. I looked like an upside down, snared rabbit.


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Been smacked with the biner end of the flip line so many times, I'm lucky I have teeth. Also, yanked a stuck throw bag so hard it shot behind me and busted a pump house window.

I've tripped over a hidden sprayer head in ivy while carrying my gear bag and saw. Had to drop the saw and face plant on the gear bag.


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I asked my wife to help me with tree work. We had just moved into our new house and I climbed a dead pine to take the top out. I had installed a 3-to-1 MA system on a tree across the yard. Ready to begin the back cut, my wife started acting as if she had never seen a pulley. We got to shouting and arguing across the distance--introducing ourselves the neighborhood.
 
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removing a heaved oak we had back guyed into another tree i was just buzzing it all off on my way up, cut a limb watched it fall hit the guy line did a somersault and landed on a fence 20' behind me. that sucks im thinking. next limb, same thing in the next section of fence.

removing a white oak, hot end of day, tired, we decide there is room to cut it in half. i spike my happy little ass up there set a block notch it and cut it. ground guy lets slack in the rope and it jumps a wrap on the portawrap. never been beaten so severely in my life ~10" where i cut it. from then on i just head on up and do it right. still have a scar from 6 years ago where a stub had its way with my abs. i also no longer leave even little stubs.
 
Cinching a canopy anchor, it was hung up in a dead twig. Gave it a jump and a pull and punched myself right in the face. Gave myself a fat lip.
Just showed up to my co workers site to help out. Negative rigging a log off a silver maple limb over a house. He set the block, tied the log off and cut and smashed right through the guys bedroom ceiling. He didn't run the rope through the block. I'm sure I got more
 
We did a job where the client left for vacation about a hour into it. Not considering us they left normally as one would for a extended time. Not thinking about it they turned on their motion sensor deer sprinklers. We found a narrow winding path about 2 ft wide where we were out of reach. Stagger to the left or right and you would get hosed.
 
I was felling some dead pines next to a customer's cabin in Arlington, WY. The back-cut kerf closed up as a tree went the wrong way towards the cabin. I pushed it as hard as I could but I couldn't get it to fall away from the cabin. I didn't have a rope or a wedge on me so I drove 30 minutes back to town to get a rope and get my friend to help. On the drive back all I could imagine was the tree halfway through the guy's roof like my icon (which is blow-down). We got back and it was still upright with less than an inch of hinge wood through a 15 inch trunk, threw a line in it and pulled it away from the cabin easily. That was almost 20 years ago.
 
One time after limbing out this maple I was getting ready to drop the spar and I notched it out and then I had to re-notch it because it was off to one side about an inch too much. That was a tough day. :burlas:
 
Tell me something stupid you did!
Well, today I opened this funny-arse thread and now I don't wanna miss any of y'all's hijinx. Keep 'em comin'!

PS - And no, I never pinched my saw so bad that I needed another to cut it free ... yet.
 
got about four blocks in the dump of a bucket truck when I thought I had time for a quick piss but didn't tell the driver. He laughed so hard when I got out at a stop sign
 
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